AUTHOR: Beth TITLE: DATE: 3/10/2004 12:10:00 AM ----- BODY:
Poetic Justice Though one was the money-grubbing son of a baseball legend, and the other a self-made businesswoman, their stories are remarkably similar in many ways. Both became notorious for their arrogance and, according to many, narcissism; and ultimately, as their twisted tales played out in the media, they echoed one another so strongly because of one common factor: greed. John Henry Williams, the only son of Red Sox legend Ted Williams, ignited the famously ignitable passions of Red Sox Nation by having his father's head cryogenically preserved after his death in 2002. Though his half-sister, Bobbi-Jo Ferrell, fought the decision, and despite the fact that the court of public opinion had resolutely ruled that the move was motivated by John Henry's desire to make money from his father, even in death, a lawsuit was dropped and the fans of Boston were forced to cope with the fact that the greatest hitter ever to play the game had been officially, physically destroyed, blasphemed, desecrated. And though I've heard the stories of the 100-year rivalry between the Red Sox and the Yankees, though I've lived in the era when the name "Roger Clemens" because synonymous with "Judas Iscariot", and though I think George Steinbrenner better hope to hell he never finds himself on some street in Southie, I don't think there's ever been a single person in Boston more universally despised. Unless, of course, you're in my little corner of existence, in which the official Enemy of All that is Good and Holy is Martha Stewart (though she ony barely edges John Henry out of the first-place spot). Some people think Marilyn Manson is the Antichrist, with all his scary makeup and songs that scare Republicans, but I am here to tell you that Martha Stewart has always been, and will always be, the earthly incarnation of the Beast. As I have said before, Martha is greedy, controlling, manipulative, self-centered, heartless, cruel, egotistical, jealous, fake, deceptive, devious, AND she drives a fucking SUV. Maybe I'm a little weird for singling her out for hatred, but I just can't help it: she is everything I despise in a person. AND she's rich and famous for being all of the above. Well. Another thing these two sorry souls now share is having each gotten their comeuppance. In the same week, no less. Martha was finally convicted of insider trading in the IMClone scandal. Now, she will be forced to resign as head of her international church of evil, Martha Stewart Omnimedia, pay a hefty fine, and she may even do jail time (although most would agree that's a definite long shot, considering her celebrity). So Martha's billion-dollar empire is crumbling, a delicious thing in and of itself. But what makes it doubly enjoyable is the fact that her massive fortunes will decline precipitously because she wanted to save $45,600. That's right. That's how much she saved by dumping her IMClone stock when she did. It gets better. After the verdict, according to, "she posted a message on her website saying, 'I am obviously distressed by the jury's verdict, but I continue to take comfort in knowing that I have done nothing wrong and that I have the enduring support of my family and friends'." Uh oh. Reports WAFF, "the reference to having done "nothing wrong" was quickly dropped, however. The sentencing guidelines that judges use consider whether defendants have accepted responsibility for their actions." Oh, Martha. How tacky. Meanwhile, John Henry Williams died of leukemia at the age of 35. Now, normally, I would shudder to even think of being glad at someone else's death. Particularly from cancer, since I know what that's like. But I can't say I'm all that sorry to see John Henry go, and I can't help feeling that he might have been getting a measure of punishment for the way he treated his father. Don't believe it? Just ask his brother in law. Florida Today did, and this is what he said:
"'Isn't it something that you're such a liar and cheat and a scoundrel your whole life that nobody even believes it when you're dead...People think it's just another one of your scams. Unbelievable. John Henry Williams spent 35 years antagonizing people," Ferrell said. "He was a cheat, a thief and a liar. He was just a miserable human being. The Bible says honor your father and you will live long. Well, he didn't honor his father, and God came calling."
Ouch. Meanwhile, Martha's getting much, much more support from her brother, Frank Kostyra. He told WAFF:
"I think the evidence the jury was presented was overwhelming, perhaps she forgot who her peers were. And they're already using words like stubborn, obnoxious...Many people claim because of her attitude her empire, her stock is gone..$200 million already since yesterday, this is devastating."
Unfortunately, however, the article goes on to describe Martha and her brother as "estranged." You don't say. P.S. (Another example of how bad karma will strike you down--->)