DATE: 2/25/2005 01:53:00 PM
1. What’s your favorite kind of cookie?
Chocolate chip, hands down. Anyone who answers differently is un-American. In fact, they may be anti-American as well.
Did you know that chocolate chip cookies are the only original American cookie recipe? Look it up. It's true. Chocolate chip cookies were invented by accident by a tollhouse attendant who was trying to make plain-chocolate cookies, but the chocolate pieces she put in the dough didn't melt as expected. Hence, Nestle-Tollhouse chocolate chip cookies.
Yep. Chocolate Chip Cookies and jazz music. The only truly American art forms.
2. Who is America’s most overrated actor?
Nicolas Cage. My hatred for Nicolas Cage burns with the fire of a million suns. If you lined up my reasons for despising Nicolas Cage end-to-end, they would loop around the moon twenty times. If you piled them up, they'd be twice the size of Mt. Everest. Nicolas Cage sucks almost as much as Martha Stewart in my book.
[P.S. This means I actually have something in common with Michelle at A Small Victory, which is probably the last time my name will ever be mentioned in the same sentence as hers, ever.]
3. Name a guilty pleasure.
4. “Scrubs” or “Everybody Loves Raymond”?
Neither. Neither. A tiny part of my soul seems to die when I watch sitcoms. I'm a real snob about the TV.
5. Name two things you can’t live without.
If there's ever a worldwide nuclear disaster that wipes out our industrial / communications infrastructure, I'm pretty much screwed.
6. Your first pet’s name + your mother’s maiden name = your porn star name.
Faye McGarry. Like Sheila's, not too pornstarrish. I believe I have just invented a word.
7. What song are you listening to right now?
The mighty wheels of commerce turning, i.e. salesmen blabbing into the phone.
8. Name your celebrity crush.
In case you're new here, Joaquin Phoenix. Here's another visual, just because:
If I ruled this country and you didn't like Joaquin Phoenix or chocolate chip cookies, I would see to it that you were deported.
9. Favorite punchline from a joke.
So the nun says, five bucks. Same as everywhere else.
10. Who do you want to pass this meme off to?